I'm going to say something that is a bit strange here and say that I don't think weight loss is an actual goal that makes a lot of sense for many people or is even what they truly want. Sure, consciously someone wants to feel better but just under the surface there is a genuine need being filled almost every time in my experience that without getting addressed FIRST, will only make shooting for weight loss temporary at best.
Here is why:
I write a lot about my client's experiences with weight loss and I have found that the weight is never the problem. The problem they are focused on isn't the real "problem" at all.
We have to shoot the arrow at the right target to get results with a goal and especially with EFT
Understanding weight and food issues as symptoms of a hidden problem, or unconscious one is a huge shift to make and it is hard for people to do. They want to focus on their body as the problem because it is easier I think to see and focus on that and frankly, we as women can do this so fast it's almost second nature to just blame ourselves or our bodies anyway in this culture at this time. But what if your body isn't broken?
Examples of what the real problem often is are varied and have to do with unconscious emotions and beliefs
I was working with my client "Linda" who was struggling with cravings for cookie dough and cake- basic sweet starchy foods as most people do- daily. Will power of course was not helping, nor was knowledge about "weight loss" and what not to do. It never does. Is there a person on the planet who doesn't know to eat sweets in moderation if they want to lose weight? Honestly, I've yet to meet a person who needs more diet advise at this point. It just confuses the issue and takes us right off track. We can tweak some nutritional and hormonal concerns later once the food is a non issue but that is very different than a "diet."
No, we needed to look deeper than that. And tapping for weight loss made everything worse when she tried it because she really wasn't interested in weight loss deep down but in solving her urgent problem: anxiety.
Notice if this is true for you as well if you are struggling with any addictive habit. We can't tap for the habit itself often unless it actually addresses the underlying need for it in the first place.
Shooting the arrow at the right target: anxiety
Ater we peeled back the layers to her recurrent anxiety about being a stay at home mom and giving up her career- this is very common I have found for a lot of women- she didn't want the cookie dough at all of course. In fact the real issue, though at first to her seemed like getting a job or starting her business, was in fact accepting herself!
It always is.
What we don't accept persists I think, not just what we resist. We often cannot accept ourselves unless… you fill in the blank. This can lead to very productive tapping and you guessed it, weight loss!
Let me end by asking this question. Where are you most anxious in your life today? What causes stress? What were the stressful events of the past before weight gain began? Begin your tapping there and I think you will find that food habits change over time and that adjusting what needs to be adjusted isn't met with resistance but with joy instead.
This is the zen master approach to healing. You don't fight with the problem but move into the solution in this way.
San Francisco, California, US
From the EFTfree Archives, which are now a part of AAMET International.
Originally published Sep 5, 2015.